Updated: Nov 5, 2019
In homeopathy, there’s a hierarchy of health. Mental —> Emotional —> Physical. Most people go to the doctor for physical complaints, but if we want true healing to occur we have to address the mental & emotional planes.
Nov 2nd was the 3 year anniversary of Ira’s conception (also the same day the Cubs won the World Series 🐻) It feels really significant as it was the turning point of everything.
The first year of motherhood was figuring out so many logistical things to keep my baby alive, while also learning to navigate the vulnerability that comes with loving another being so much.
And since he turned 1, everything shifted. The exhaustion, sleep deprivation and drop in hormones from weaning really settled in and I felt it ALL. I had to learn to parent which is very different, in my opinion, than mothering. And simultaneously, I made a gigantic transition from medical student to doctor, another real identity rocker.
Even though I’ve been a mother now for exactly 3 years, I am just at the beginning stages of transitioning out of my maiden self. I hadn’t even considered this concept to be honest until the last several months when I started to feel myself literally transform.
Every single aspect of my life has been been in question the last 6 months. Where I want to live. Who I want to live near. How I want to parent. How I can sent up a life that allows my family to thrive. As well as which relationships in my life need more attention and which need to be let go of.
I’ve completely stopped putting effort into relationships that were not lifting me up. Especially those that felt unbalanced. I’ve put more effort into my relationship with my partner. We go to regular counseling to help us navigate this new season of our lives. And most importantly, I’ve put way more effort into my relationship with myself and have explored spiritual healing on a whole different level than I’ve ever stepped into before.
And to be honest it’s taking me back…..way back. To my ancestors. To where the programs and DNA that I’ve inherited all started. Because becoming a mother and really having to step into a parent role has been the single biggest motivator to get my sh*t together fully. There is no longer space for the narratives I’ve carried with me for so many years that are simply not true. I have no energy for people who are draining to me. And there is no better reason than my son to fully heal, not just from my childhood trauma, but also the ancestral patterns that that have been passed on through generations that are simply not serving us in this present day. I want the bad to stop here and to more fully embrace and understand all the good I’ve inherited too.
It’s extremely important to me to parent consciously. To not operate out of learned programs, beliefs or societal norms but rather what feels true and authentic to me. To trust my intuition fully and not waiver in the judgement of others for stepping outside of the lines.
I am choosing to fully embrace myself in this new season of life. Because truly I do believe I am wonderful. And how funny that it takes so much courage to say that out loud. For most of my life I’ve been told I’m too sensitive, too emotional, too this or that. I’ve worried about what others think too much. I’ve let other people’s narratives about me dim my fire.
My son deserves to be modeled self love and I am taking my duty of this very seriously. It has felt so liberating to fully step into my power as a highly sensitive woman. To embrace my intuition and acknowledge that I have very special gifts that are meant for this world.
It’s been one hell of a transformative year and I am nowhere near figuring it all out. But damn, it feels so good to feel so deeply in my body that I am on the right path. It’s also very exciting to see how things will shift as I heal on this deeper emotional plane.
Here’s to being wide open and expansive. To true healing and honoring the most authentic parts of yourself. The world truly needs us as we were designed to be. ✨